On: Sex On The First Date

8:22 PM

Okay, here we go with the societal rules and expectations again. Why is this even still a topic of discussion? Why in a generation where Rihanna can bare it all, literally, are we still judging people for having sex on the first date? Sex on the first date is just that: sex. If you decide that you want to sleep with someone on the first date, third date, seventh date, a year later, who really cares?


Oh, I get it. We're still stuck on this good girl image. Good girls don't kiss and tell. Good girls don't sleep with guys on the first date. We should wait 90 days before we give up the nookie. Guys have no respect for girls that give up the goods on the first go 'round. Quite frankly, those guys are certainly not meant for girls like me. I'm all about testing the product before I buy. I mean, we have fitting rooms in clothing stores for a reason. They let you test drive cars because it's smart. Before you commit to something, you want to make sure it fits. You want to make sure that you like it before you waste anyone's time investing in something that isn't even beneficial to you. I'm not about that life. I need to make sure that anything that I am bringing into my life is going to make me happy and keep me satisfied. Including a man.

Another issue I have is the whole lady in the streets freak in the sheets mentality that most men have. This ties into the whole idea that "respectable" girls don't sleep with a guy they just met. If she's sleeping with me on the first date, how many other guys has she done this with? You know what. Forget that mess. You want a girl that can drop to her knees to pray and to please you. I'm not saying they don't exist. They do. But most of us have dirty laundry. We've had a partner or two (or many more), which doesn't necessarily make us a saint. But it makes us no sinner either. Why must be bottle up our past and keep everything a secret just because it may bruise the male ego? Nobody cares that women are put into this tiny box that we are constantly destroying and breaking out of. The expectation is not realistic. The freaky librarian or the naughty church girl is a fantasy. The exception. This is not how most girls live their lives. Get over it.

And for those of you that are pulling the safety card and bringing up the fact that there are diseases out there, this is the twenty first century. Use a freaking condom for goodness sake! There is no time limit on when it's safe to sleep with someone before you can be exposed to a disease. It takes one time. There are couples that have been married for years and infidelity exposes them both to all kinds of STI's and such out there in the world. Casual sex has become the norm. I'm not saying that's wonderful. But I am saying that it is the norm. Protection is readily available and at your disposal 24 hours a day/7 days a week. I mean, I'm sure that everyone has a 24 hr. CVS somewhere close to them. If you become infected from anything after having sex on the first date, you just weren't practicing safe sex. Simple as that.

I just hate the double standard. Guys score on the first date and he's the man. He wined and dined the girl right out of her panties. A girl scores on the first date she was used, she let the man get into her head, she should have waited. But why? Please explain this to me. Oh yeah. This male dominated society. Please forgive me for stepping out of my place. But I mean, REALLY? We as a people and a generation can change this. We can teach our daughters to be head strong and free and still have respect for themselves. We can teach women that we have control of our bodies and we shouldn't live in fear that if we actually do what we want to do we will be banished into societal hell for the rest of our lives. Stop the judgment. Stop looking down at people for living their lives as they see fit. Simple put: mind your own freaking business.

So in case I haven't made myself clear, here's how I feel about the matter. You want to sleep with a guy on the first date. Go for it! It's your body, do with it as you please. And it's not because I'm some radical feminist seeking to tear down the walls of sexism, although I can be this on some days. It's just because I want everyone to have the liberty to do as they please with whom they please. As long as we're not harming anyone, sex between two consensual adults should be fine, no matter how long they've known each other. Don't stick your nose where it doesn't belong. Sheesh. Who made all you pricks the vagina police? Go do something else with your life. There are more important things in the world to be concerned about than whether or not someone is having sex on the first date. Find a hobby and leave all of us free-willed, strong minded young women alone. We'd appreciate it.


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